Built like an industrial-sized fridge, big Boris Krcmar claimed the latest MODUS Super Series honours, defeating Jack Tweddell in the final for a £5k payday and duly stamping his spot at Champions Week.
When Boris finally left Portsmouth, the Live Lounge buffet probably breathed a sigh of relief. The Croatian might look as intimidating as a tank driven by Chuck Norris racing towards you, flanked by a squadron of angry, sword-wielding Vikings who’d just discovered they’d missed a ‘buy one, get one free’ sale on axes. In reality, though, he’s a true gent.
Furthermore, and more importantly when it’s your job, Krcmar is an incredibly talented arrow-smith. The sort of bloke who looks capable of folding you into a carry-on suitcase but, in truth, would simply hammer you on the oche instead.
The five-time Croatian PDC World Cup of Darts representative safely navigated his journey to Finals Day. Once there, found himself grouped with talented Irishman Connor Heneghan and former Lakeside champ Scott Mitchell. Plenty of jeopardy there.
However, Dum Dum – which is one of Boris’ nicknames, not that I have a death wish – defeated both, conceding just a solitary leg to Scotty Dog who, dressed in bright pink, would be absolutely useless in a game of hide and seek. Unless, of course, the hiding place happened to be inside Barbie’s Malibu Mansion.
In the other round robin group, Tweddell got the better of Jack Drayton 4-2 before whitewashing Robbie Martin to advance to the semis. Efficient, clinical and about as subtle as your neighbour deciding 7am on a Sunday is the ideal time to pressure wash his driveway.
After being smashed 4-0 by Boris, Heneghan probably wanted a bit of a rest to come around. Unfortunately, time was of the essence and he returned immediately. Awaiting him was the best thing to come out of Swindon’s since the M40, Jack Tweddell, with the ADC Global Champ booking his place in the final courtesy of a 4-1 scoreline. Connor’s reward for surviving Boris was essentially being thrown straight into another woodchipper.
Then Big Boris continued his dominating form, beating Robbie Martin to set up a fascinating clash with Jack. By this point, the Croatian was playing with all the warmth and compassion of a parking attendant five minutes before your ticket expires.
So after almost a week of high-octane, quality action, it came down to a Croatian the size of your average semi-detached house against a bloke whose greatest-ever triumph came several months ago on that very stage. David versus Goliath, if Goliath had spent the previous decade deadlifting tractors and David had packed his own set of tungsten.
Experience and sheer land-mass advantage were in Krcmar’s favour. A Global Championship title victory and a love of performing at the Live Lounge in Pompey sat on Tweddell’s side of the scales. Sadly for Jack, even the most optimistic estate agent would have struggled to value that against approximately fourteen acres of Croatian.
But there could only be one winner and, with a twist of irony, the result ended as an exact reversal of the recent FIFA World Cup meeting between the two nations represented.
Final Score: Croatia 4-2 England.
Congrats to Boris, who will undoubtedly be a threat in Champions Week – and, of course, I don’t mean physically. If that were the case, MODUS wouldn’t need to bother staging it.
