The UKDA swung into Bolton for a weekend of action and the crowning of champions.
I have fond memories of this Lancashire town. Well, I say fond. It was where my manager at the time, Mac Elkin, used to hotel-up his players and give me the thankless task of driving back and forth to Wigan countless times each day for Players Championship events. Traffic assessment: not fun. Thanks, mate. There were perfectly good places to stay much closer, buddy!
Anyway, as usual, I digress. I wasn’t actually sure where the event was being staged until my good mate, Jarred Cole, who runs the catering at the MODUS Live Lounge, told me.
In fact, the King of the Castle himself was in action at the UKDA National Finals. As someone I genuinely have a lot of affection for and rate as an incredibly talented player on his day, I decided to stay true to tradition and start by taking the piss out of him.
Jarred was competing in the singles event while also teaming up with his Jurassic-named brother, Rex. The Cole boys enjoyed a run shorter than the one I make to the ice cream van whenever its badly tuned music echoes down our street. They went out at the last-16 stage but, in fairness, it was in a last-leg decider.
Maybe if Rex had had longer arms, unlike his Tyrannosaurus ancestors, it could have been a different story. Then, in the individual competition, Jarred got ‘Slated’ by Alan Slater in the opening round. Around the same time, his brother joined him back in their tent after losing to Rob Channing.
Hey, at least the catering department had an extra pair of hands in the kitchen for most of the day.
Someone who didn’t have time for flipping burgers, though, was little Jack Johnson. This kid is incredible. There’s not much of him, but the 14-year-old can’t half chuck a dart.
The teenage sensation was just that, dropping only eight legs en route to the final, where he defeated PDC Tour Card holder Owen Bates, whose stance at the oche resembles the Leaning Tower of Pisa. How he doesn’t topple over is beyond me.
However, topple he did in the showdown, with Jacky Boy pipping Owen to the post 6-4 in an exhilarating final. That means the UKDA Men’s Singles title will be winging its way back to one of my former hometowns, Orpington in Kent, with, dare I say it, its youngest-ever winner. Well done, little fella.
If you want to catch Jack in action, he’ll be part of a star-studded trio alongside Colin Lloyd and Duzza at Ben Nicholson’s Blackpool Darts Exhibition on Tuesday 21st July at the H&A Club. I believe it’s sold out, but it’s always nice to give Ben a plug. Every year he says it’s his last. Pity.
Another friend of Bang On Target, Vicky Pruim, claimed the Ladies’ UKDA Singles crown, defeating the legendary Deta Hedman in the final. You always know that if the Caribbean Queen turns up to an event, she’s going to be in the mix.
On this occasion, though, the reigning Lakeside Champion was second best to the Chester resident, who was born in Belgium and competes under the Swedish flag. I doubt there are too many of them!
Back to the National Pairs event. In the Men’s competition, honours went to John-Sebastian Wright and Ashley Coleman, who, with the nickname ‘The Prince of Darkness’, would scare even Dracula. They defeated fellow English pairing Reece Robinson and Lee Budgen 4-3 in the final.
In the Ladies’ event, honours also went England’s way, with Sally Smith and Kate Hulme whitewashing the Welsh pairing of Eve Watson and Sandra Quinn.
There was also the UKDA Champions Cup on the line, and the Men’s title went to Portcullis, who edged out Kings Head 4-3 in the final. Ironically, there was another Jarred Cole link there but, by that point, he was too busy frying chips to have noticed the match.
In the Ladies’ equivalent, it was Armed & Hammered, which sounds like the perfect name for a UKDA weekend of darts, defeating Springfield A, consisting of Homer, Marge, Chief Wiggum and Principal Skinner, with Groundskeeper Willie on the bench.
A fun, action-packed weekend, I’m sure. Congratulations to all the winners.
