The Oche & The Pitch

When professional arrow-smiths are not competing – which, frankly, is about as rare these days as a polite social media debate – many of them tend to immerse themselves in other sports. Sometimes in a playing capacity. More often sat in the stands shouting tactical advice despite possessing the athleticism of an injured sloth.

Whilst golf, pool, snooker, Formula One and rugby all appear popular among the tungsten fraternity, there is absolutely no doubting football is the one which truly grips them. Because, just like darts, it is tribal, emotional and full of middle-aged men screaming at foreigners for not hitting targets properly.

So, let us take a deeply unnecessary but highly entertaining look at who supports whom.

MANCHESTER UNITED

As a Liverpool supporter, I shall be approaching this section with the warmth and compassion of a tax inspector repossessing a pensioner’s mobility scooter. Naturally, there are several Manchester United fans on the PDC circuit. Oddly though, a sizeable percentage are not actually from Manchester itself. Liverpool fans have a term for these people – glory hunters. Although given United’s recent footballing trajectory resembles a shopping trolley rolling downhill into a canal, the phrase perhaps no longer applies.

Most famously, reigning World Champion Luke Littler is a proud Red Devil, despite his true sporting love being Warrington Wolves. When he lifted the Sid Waddell Trophy, he paraded it around Old Trafford. Shame he didn’t do it with the Premier League one, the closest some United fans have been to spotting that particular piece of silverware since Sir Alex Ferguson still had functioning knees.

I will give Nathan Aspinall slightly more leniency. The Stockport-born thrower at least hails from Greater Manchester and even spent time on United’s books as a youth goalkeeper before getting injured and realising he was shit-hot at darts.

Despite being a rabid Rangers F.C. supporter, Josh Rock also follows Manchester United. The same applies to Gian van Veen and whatever Dutch side he supports back home. I only know this because I have unfortunately witnessed both men wearing United shirts socially. Naturally, my respect for them instantly evaporated quicker than Prince Andrew’s forehead moisture during a police interrogation.

Continuing the Manc-Paddy alliance, Daryl Gurney is also a United supporter. So too is Bradford-born Joe Cullen who somehow ignored every Yorkshire side available and instead chose emotional suffering. Even stranger, the Rockstar even follows Wigan Warriors despite Bradford historically being one of rugby league’s major strongholds. Truly astonishing geographical betrayal. Michael Smith completes the list of major names firmly attached to the Old Trafford circus.

LIVERPOOL

Unsurprisingly, Stephen Bunting is the PDC’s chief Liverpool representative. As the only genuine Scouser among the elite names, The Bullet regularly attends matches whenever darting commitments permit. Although, rather disappointingly, he does so from the executive boxes alongside the prawn sandwich brigade instead of roaring abuse from Row Z with a warm Carling in hand.

Jonny Clayton is also a Liverpool supporter, although much like compatriot Gerwyn Price, his true sporting affection belongs to rugby. Which, in fairness, is understandable. Welsh rugby supporters are essentially born holding a rugby ball and emotionally preparing for annual heartbreak.

Amusingly, Brendan Dolan supports Liverpool. And I say amusingly because his partner Teresa follows Manchester United. I imagine North-West Derby weekends in that household resemble a hostage negotiation with less diplomacy and more passive-aggressive tea making.

Then there is Dave Chisnall, another St Helens native and another Liverpool supporter. Given the town’s location directly between Liverpool and Manchester, most children there probably emerge from the womb already being asked to pick a side.

NEWCASTLE UNITED

A no-brainer on the sport’s most prominent Newcastle United F.C. fanatic – it is of course Chris Dobey. Born and raised on Tyneside, Hollywood follows Newcastle with the kind of obsessive devotion usually reserved for cult leaders and people who collect swords. To be fair to him, he even travels across Europe watching them and was present in Spain when FC Barcelona spanked his boys in the Champions League recently.

Although whether Dobey remembers much of the evening is another matter entirely. He does not drink while playing darts. Football, however, appears to operate under very different hydration guidelines.

Fellow Geordies Callan Rydz and Ryan Joyce also support Newcastle, although nowhere near with Dobey’s religious fervour. The man has even met Ant & Dec. For a Newcastle fan, that is basically the equivalent of Moses popping out for a latte with God.

THE REST

Famously, Luke Humphries is a devoted Leeds United F.C. supporter. Despite being born in Berkshire and living in Crewe, he inherited his football allegiance from his father and apparently his own name derives from Leeds United Kings of Europe. Which is wonderfully poetic apart from the microscopic issue that Leeds technically never became kings of Europe.

Michael van Gerwen adores football in general, although pinning down his exact Dutch allegiance feels harder than catching smoke with a butterfly net. I know Jermaine Wattimena supports Ajax but with MVG, certainty is elusive. Thanks largely to Robin van Persie, his English side is Arsenal. Though whether he truly cares depends entirely on The Gunner’s current league position. Now maybe the ideal time to do just that.

A sizeable chunk of the remaining elite names could not care less about football anyway. Gary Anderson would rather be fishing somewhere remote with absolutely no human interaction. Gezzy lives and breathes rugby. Damon Heta randomly adopted Nottingham Forest F.C. shortly after moving to Britain – I even bought him a scarf once, which I assume is laying around somewhere in his house.

As for the majority of foreign football-loving players, they generally support whichever club their fathers emotionally burdened them with during childhood. Football fandom is rarely chosen. It is inherited like bad knees, high cholesterol and irrational hatred towards rival postcodes.