That’s all folks as far as World Cup of Darts qualification goes for those nations blessed with more than two tour card holders. The Austrian Darts Open was the final opportunity to grab a jersey for Frankfurt next month and, like a nightclub bouncer after three sambucas, the qualification window has now firmly slammed shut.
Welsh darts fans have been dealt a significant blow with the news that Gerwyn Price has withdrawn from the World Cup of Darts. The Iceman has been battling a niggling back injury in recent months, one which appears to flare up more frequently than a Ryanair checkout desk dispute. That leaves Jonny Clayton partnering the next highest-ranked Cymru chucker, Nick Kenny. Worse still for Wales, the change means they surrender their fourth-seed status to Scotland. Absolutely no disrespect to Nick Kenny, who is a very decent thrower, but it is fairly obvious who Jonny Clayton would rather have standing alongside him. Gezzy’s withdrawal will do little to improve Clayton’s enthusiasm for travelling to Germany either – a destination he already seems to have absolutely zero interest in visiting for Players Championship events.
Reigning World Champion Luke Littler has previously made it crystal clear he would rather stand in the Kop End with a pasty in hand cheering on Liverpool than play darts in Germany. Yet he turned up last year alongside Luke Humphries and it looks likely to be the same pairing again in June. Failing that, James Wade is waiting in reserve. Not exactly a panic-buy replacement – more like discovering your spare tyre is made of solid gold.
A situation similar to the one Wales currently find themselves in could also unfold with the Dutch. You can ink Gian van Veen into the team immediately. MVG though? That depends entirely on whether he decides to attend. Michael van Gerwen has had plenty on his plate over the past twelve months – not least going through a divorce, which in itself is about as enjoyable as standing barefoot on Lego. Ouchie. If an event does not sufficiently stimulate Van Gerwen, there are usually far more enjoyable alternatives available – spending valuable time with his children being the obvious one. Other than that, Mighty Mike may simply decide to head for Ibiza and lurk around a DJ booth while attempting to avoid some random muppet swinging for his face like a drunk seagull attacking chips.
Last year’s champions Northern Ireland remain unchanged with Rocky and Bullwinkle – otherwise known as Gurney. Australia, meanwhile, has undergone a refurbishment and a significantly less-bearded one at that. Damon Heta still provides the team’s facial-hair lunacy, but with Adam Leek earning a tour card in January, the legendary Simon Whitlock has effectively been escorted towards the darting retirement village. Expect ridiculous hats and enough face paint to decorate a nursery wall regardless.
As for Scotland, it is a World Cup debut for IKEA staff’s greatest nemesis, Cameron Menzies. Yes, Cammie will partner Gary Anderson this year while Peter Wright waits in reserve wearing enough colours to resemble an exploding paint factory. In recent weeks, Menzies has also found himself a very attractive girlfriend. So apparently, he is punching successfully away from both furniture and darts these days.
Host nation Germany currently has Martin Schindler and Ricardo Pietreczko lined up for Frankfurt. Captain Schindi possesses one of the least imaginative nicknames in all of sport – The Wall. It is basically the equivalent of calling somebody from Egypt “The Pyramid” or an Italian bloke “The Pizza”. Still, whatever works, I guess. Ironically, no Chinese chucker has ever gone with a wall-related moniker though – after all, the one they have is massive. And it is still standing.
As for Ricardo Pietreczko, he is currently struggling massively with the fairly important art of actually throwing darts due to a condition we only tend to whisper about in this game. He could theoretically decide, “screw this, I’d love to play but I’m not at my best and don’t want to let my country down”, before handing the jersey over to Niko Springer. But with £5,000 available simply for turning up and wearing a shirt, that feels about as likely as finding a bargain pint at Heathrow Airport. Unless, of course, he and Meenzur Bub somehow strike a backroom arrangement involving schnitzels and a few bottles of pilsner.
Then we arrive at the darting world’s longest-running soap opera – Belgium. One week they all despise one another. The next they are embracing like emotional contestants reunited on “Long Lost Families”. Trying to keep up with Belgian darts relationships is like attempting to follow an entire season of “Love Island” after accidentally missing half the episodes. As things currently stand, I believe Mike De Decker and Dimitri Van den Bergh are on decent terms and neither particularly likes Kim Huybrechts – although that never stops them fist-bumping one another every fourteen seconds. It will be The Dreammaker and The Real Deal representing Belgium. But deep down, many neutrals are secretly praying one withdraws so Kim gets drafted in purely for the chaos. We all enjoy a little needle, especially between teammates and Belgium treat awkward tension like it is an Olympic discipline. They also hold the unofficial world record for celebratory fist bumps during a single match, a tally which comfortably runs into three figures. Honestly, even a stray 26 gets acknowledged like somebody has invented the wheel.
Meanwhile, it may have initially appeared that Mickey Mansell changed nationalities simply to acquire an Irish passport and avoid ten-hour airport queues across Europe. I have absolutely no evidence for this whatsoever, but frankly it is believable enough to print. What it also means is that, due to The Clonoe Cyclone sitting above Keane Barry in the rankings, it is he who will partner William O’Connor in representing Ireland. Some might say that is rather unfortunate for Dynamite who, upon hearing the news, allegedly began making enquiries into the nationalities of his grandparents – perhaps hoping one was born in Mongolia.
Other countries capable of causing damage include Czechia and Sweden. Adam Gawlas is back on tour and reunites with Karel Sedlacek after a year away. Gawlas has done well since returning to the PDC, although his throwing speed still requires serious attention if he expects anyone to enthusiastically sit through Czechia versus a random Asian pairing without occasionally checking whether the kettle has boiled. Sweden, meanwhile, once again proves birthplace means absolutely nothing. Jeffrey de Graaf essentially moved to Scandinavia after meeting an attractive Swedish woman, realised there was a possible World Cup route available and sensibly thought “that’ll do nicely”. It is basically the darts equivalent of the Republic of Ireland football team rummaging through family trees looking for a grandparent from Galway. His partner Oskar Lukasiak is, to be fair, a decent player. Slight issue though – he is yet to win a single game on tour this year. If I am being completely honest, I would currently rather watch Zlatan Ibrahimović throw arrows purely for the comedy value.
Now, on paper – or indeed on the oche – Poland look dangerous. Krzysztof Ratajski and Sebastian Bialecki are both in excellent nick this season. Granted, they collectively possess the charisma of an unplugged photocopier, but they are very good at the one thing that matters most – actually playing darts.
The USA were the last team to get their shit together – eventually confirming it would be Adam Sevada and Stowe Buntz to wear the Stars & Stripes. Typically, for countries with just the one tour card holder, they are often saddled with a compatriot who does not exactly fill them with confidence. Something Jose de Sousa suffered annually. As Portugal’s only recognised chucker, he would discover his partner every spring before spending the next half hour frantically Googling them like a man trying to identify a mystery parcel left on his doorstep.
Too many other nations exist to mention individually. There will inevitably be several charismatic lads from Asia celebrating a double like they have just retained the Ryder Cup. Last year one bloke even rocked up in a hoodie. Another wore enough earrings to make Pat Butcher look understated. And do not even get me started on the hairstyles. Some of them resemble failed science experiments conducted in a wind tunnel. Yet all of it adds colour, chaos and glorious unpredictability to the event. With Africa, both American continents and the Caribbean all represented, the World Cup remains one of the darting calendar’s most entertaining spectacles.
So in summary, for the six previous winners of the World Cup, this is how they line up. There’s only one paragraph left so for Welsh tungsten lovers, you are fine to skip that one.
- ENGLAND: Luke Littler & Luke Humphries
- WALES: Jonny Clayton & Nick Kenny
- NETHERLANDS: Gian van Veen & Michael van Gerwen
- NORTHERN IRELAND: Josh Rock & Daryl Gurney
- SCOTLAND: Gary Anderson & Cameron Menzies
- AUSTRALIA: Damon Heta & Adam Leek
Finally, something of possible entertainment. If one of the Belgians pulls out and Kim gets involved, well that could be fun because The Hurricane at the World Cup is never dull. He is essentially the darts equivalent of handing a toddler a drum kit and hoping for the best.
