The day finally arrived. Operation Bullseye II at the stunning Bradmoor Farm in Aylesbury played host to a star-studded event, raising much-needed awareness and funds for some fantastic charities.

Also, it was a chance for the organiser and brains behind Defence Darts Community, Zara Durrant to finally take a breath, relax and admire all the sterling work she had done. Although, knowing her, I very much doubt that happened!

So, let’s dissect the event first. Sixteen current or former pro’s, along with Zara’s uncle, kindly gave up their free time. They were each paired with either a current serving member of His Majesty’s Armed Forces or a veteran spanning the Royal Air Force, Royal Navy and Army.

Listed below are all the pairings and results. But before you scroll down, have a read and hopefully a little chuckle with me first!

Duzza, as confident as ever, predicted his team wouldn’t drop a leg all night. And, to be fair, he was right – they dropped two, losing their opener in straight sets to the often yellow tartan-trousered Scott Williams and his buddy for the night, Darren Morton. Still, that left Glen free to go and tell everyone in attendance how he once won the Premier League. If there was a nearby Tesco, he’d have wandered around the aisles there too spreading the news.

After the opening round, half the line-up was out and free to go and get hammered, whilst the rest remained in contention – also free to get hammered. Now Chris Dobey doesn’t drink at the darts – he makes up for it at Newcastle United matches and stag weekends in Ibiza. So this was a tricky dilemma because it fell somewhere in between both camps. Perhaps vodka and Tango was a nice compromise.

During the interval, fans were treated to a Devon Petersen dance recital. That said, it could have been a double act. Dimitri Van den Bergh was a late cancellation and his replacement, Ritchie Edhouse, can’t dance for shit, so everyone caught a bit of a break instead of watching Madhouse attempting to moonwalk.

Then suddenly, disaster. Justin Hood went missing. After a frantic search, though, someone found him hiding in a pint glass. Panic over.

Ricky Evans, meanwhile, was wandering from table to table showing everyone a photo of his stunning girlfriend, often being greeted with the phrase, “You’re well punching there, mate.” To be fair, he knows.

Scottish slinger Alan Soutar – an ex-serviceman, which technically means he could have paired with himself – was, by this point, teasing Devon to a dance-off. The South African’s funny hand thing against a Highland Fling. Not exactly a wealth of great options. It was around that point the bar suddenly became extremely busy.

On the way down to Bradmoor Farm, Tom Sykes accidentally got caught by a ray of sunshine, so upon arrival, trained nurse Keegan Brown was treating the ginger chucker for severe sunstroke. Will Tom ever learn? Indoors at all times, mate. If not, a full industrial radiation suit is required. You’ve only got yourself to blame, son.

Glowing brighter than a red traffic light, the recent Slovak Darts Open semi-finalist did manage to get a few words out:

“Zara and her team did a great job putting this event together and deserve a huge amount of credit for what they do for veterans and charities.” It was at that point Keegan arrived with another bucket of Aloe Vera.

ITV’s Chris Mason was busy juggling commentary duties with playing, calling one of his own missed doubles words that cannot be repeated on air before the watershed. Anyway, given Mace usually wears shirts louder than an RAF jet fighter flying through Glastonbury’s sound system, there was absolutely no chance of him ever getting lost like little Mr Hood. In fact, with his wardrobe collection, he’s more likely to blind you than lose a game of Hide and Seek.

Shortly after a Hawaiian surfer with equally bad taste in fashion won Chris’s shirt on the raffle, the expert comms man did have these kind words to say:

“Last time was incredible, this year’s operation bullseye was overwhelming, the work by Zara and her team was humbling, congrats to everyone involved it was a pleasure and a honour to be involved.” Well said sir.

Back to the tournament. After some great battles, it came down to the semi-finals. Reigning champions Keegan Brown and his partner, with the perfect-sounding name for the occasion, Vince Tipple, exited at the hands of Deta and Chris Harvey, who then duly despatched Ricky Evans and dead former snooker professional John Spencer who – due to a shortage of numbers – Zara and the team dug up and stuck a set of tungsten in his hands. Needless to say, Rapid and Spence lost.

The other semi saw Dobes and Darren McMahon get the better of Mace and Magowan, who sound like some kind of detective duo. Or, even worse, a firm of solicitors who specialise in people suffering injuries after being hit in the arse with a dart. Quite a niche area, it has to be said.

Not sure that game was first to three legs and Deta’s was a race to two. Hardly baffling on a Bermuda Triangle scale, it just made me naturally curious, that’s all.

Then, in the final, the prize went to Dobes and Daz, as I shall refer to them. The Caribbean Queen and Chris Harvey – whom the reigning Lakeside champion has amusingly christened ‘The Beard to be Feared’ – enjoyed a terrific run. In the end, though, it proved to be one mountain too steep. Although I’m fairly sure someone already has that nickname, Deta. An Aussie fella, if I’m not mistaken!

As for the prize – well, I absolutely loved this. Think of the kind of medal our brave Armed Forces personnel are awarded. Then imagine it being about a hundred times larger and that gives you an idea of what is proudly known as the Andrew Wood Memorial Trophy, named in honour of huge supporter of the event, Laura’s father.

Andrew was the creator of both Bullseye and its colourful mascot, Bully. You know, the one who wandered across the bottom of the screen with a dictionary in hand, correcting everyone’s spelling before letting out a hearty “moo” every few seconds.

Congratulations to them. For Dobey, only his second major. But because someone caught it on video, which you can see via the link below, it technically counts as a televised one. As for the final score – God only knows. Whoever was on Darts Connect duty had clearly headed to the bar!

https://www.facebook.com/share/v/176M7MW5EF/

I asked Zara what the grand total raised was. Although it will be a few days until the final figure is calculated, the amount is in the region of a whopping £18,000. There are so many wonderful charities that will benefit enormously from this donation. Far too many to mention individually, but if you’d like to click the link just below and scroll down, you can see them all.

https://www.defencedartscommunity.co.uk/operationbullseye

Also, a huge thank you must also go to the wonderful sponsors, whose generous support was instrumental in making Operation Bullseye II such a tremendous success. Their backing was enormously appreciated by everyone involved.

So, take a bow: Target Darts, Vistavis, Serco, Absolute, Deploy, Portal Security, Mayfair IT Consultancy, Forces Transition Group, Cobalt Human Solutions, Pickfords, Thales, Silverback Fire Solutions, Healing Military Minds and, of course, everyone’s favourite loveable guy, Bully. Without your support, none of this would have been possible.

Mentions must also go to MC, Sky Sports’ very own Michael Bridge. He’s a Spurs fan, so it’s been a tough year for him. It must have been nice to head out and not have to return home after seeing his football team lose for a change. Entertaining the troops, as well as everyone else, was the very funny Pat Smith. I wasn’t there, so I’ve no idea how amusing he actually was. But with a room full of pissed-up darts players and defence folk, they’d pretty much laugh at anything.

Then there were a couple of PDC referees in Mr Tops n Tales Podcast host, Huw Ware, and a lad who, when entering a large room or arena, looks like he’s lost his mum but is, in fact, an adult. More importantly, he’s a world-class referee and the creator of videos containing poor acting skills from the extras involved – Mr Owen Binks.

There were also a few other special guests. Stunning Sky Sports walk-on star Jade was there throughout the evening and was probably the reason around eighteen pints ended up decorating the floor. Excited Armed Forces lads momentarily took their eyes off where they were going, became distracted for just a second – more than enough time to trip over a chair. You can guess the rest.

Former Liverpool and England striker Emile Heskey also generously gave up his time, happily posing for pictures with what seemed like just about everyone in the room – probably except the Man United fans. Army veteran and professional boxer Ross ‘The Boss’ Burkinshaw, was another hugely popular guest. Of course, if you turn up to a venue like this carrying a couple of championship belts, every bloke in the room is suddenly convinced he’s Tyson Fury and wants a photo wearing one. Yes, it happened. Didn’t it, Uncle Glen?

But to round this article up, a massive shout out to the fantastically talented and constantly super-stressed organiser of the Operation Bullseye concept, Zara Durrant. Without her, none of this would have been possible, leaving a bunch of people sat in Bradmoor Farm wondering what the hell they were doing there.

The darts tournament was just the cherry on top of the cake. But the cake itself, and all the icing, was about raising much-needed funds for some amazing charities. And on that score, the box was well and truly ticked.

A huge well done to everyone involved. And the final words should really go Zara. So that’s what’s going to happen:

“I’m incredibly proud of all the military players. The way they conducted themselves throughout the event was a credit to them, and they played some fantastic darts. The crowd was made up almost entirely of serving military personnel, veterans and our sponsors, and the atmosphere was absolutely incredible. You simply can’t buy that kind of energy – it comes from building a genuine community.

“Every one of the professionals gave up their time completely free of charge and were so engaging with everyone throughout the evening. The number of people who came up to me and said they’ll remember that night for the rest of their lives was overwhelming. Comments like that are exactly why I do what I do.”

LAST 16
Keegan Brown/Vince Tipple 2-1 James Richardson/Carl Webb
Deta Hedman/Chris Harvey 2-0 Ritchie Edhouse/Danny Humphries
Scott Williams/Darren Morton 2-0 Glen Durrant/Jamie Gibson
Ricky Evans/John Spencer 2-0 Justin Hood/Daniel Appleby
Tom Sykes/Brett Morgan Williams 2-1 Scott Mitchell/Iain Campbell
Chris Mason/Connor Magowan 2-0 Colin Lloyd/Jaspar Scarrott
Alan Soutar/Gary Whittles 2-0 Devon Petersen/Gareth Edwards
Chris Dobey/Darren McMahon 2-1 Tony O’Shea/Mark Bower

QUARTER-FINALS
Deta Hedman/Chris Harvey 2-1 Keegan Brown/Vince Tipple
Ricky Evans/John Spencer 2-1 Scott Williams/Darren Morton
Chris Mason/Connor Magowan 2-1 Tom Sykes/Brett Morgan Williams
Chris Dobey/Darren McMahon 2-0 Alan Soutar/Gary Whittles

SEMI-FINALS
Deta Hedman/Chris Harvey 2-1 Ricky Evans/John Spencer
Chris Dobey/Darren McMahon 3-1 Chris Mason/Connor Magowan

FINAL
Chris Dobey/Darren McMahon – NO IDEA! – Deta Hedman/Chris Harvey